Random Thought Generator

HERE YE! HERE YE!

Wed, 30 Mar 2005 13:38:55 GMT

Attention all interested parties! Please add the_9th_wonder to your friends list for guarantee the lunacy in your lives do not end with this post. That is all.

Zombie chow? Not I.

Thu, 17 Mar 2005 11:50:07 GMT

Official Survivor
Congratulations! You scored 78%!

Whether through ferocity or quickness, you made it out. You made the right choice most of the time, but you probably screwed up somewhere. Nobody's perfect, at least you're alive.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 77% on survivalpoints

Link: The Zombie Scenario Survivor Test written by ci8db4uok on Ok Cupid

Somebody help settle a bet

Thu, 17 Mar 2005 11:17:18 GMT

Happy St. Patty's day to aaaall me micks n' spics out thar!...

A difference of opinion incited by a recent death in the building^1.. Mom, bless her heart, insists that if a dog, or any quadruped pet, is left locked up with their owner's corpse for a long time, that he or she would become hungry enough to devour their once living, breathing master. I say that ain't gonna happen, no matter how long the dog, cat, parakeet, or whatever, has been left with a rotting meat bag.

My cough has finally, completely and totally left. It was keeping me up the past two mornings and it's about time it's gone for good.

The so called tech support staff, lazy Wayne, at work finally got around to getting my email for Quest Diagnostics's interanet up and running. This makes me and official bureaucratic peon. oooh joy! *sniff*

1. See the first of March 16th's entries.

Apparently Ashley, who unfriended me, is a bitter queen. hmm?

Wed, 16 Mar 2005 11:39:56 GMT

I am so irritated! that bitter old queen lonelystreet gone and said that I got caught talking to ___mush and talking crap about anaxareteia. If I get my hands on them I'm gonna kick some heads!

This entry automatically generated by the LJ Drama Generator!

HOLY SHIT!!!

Wed, 16 Mar 2005 11:36:45 GMT

Mom just told me that this old guy from our building died like five days ago and they found his body yesterday afternoon. He wasn't even that old. In his mid to late fifties. Apparently he didn't show up to work Friday or Monday or Tuesday. When the folks at American Airlines, where he worked, tried calling his flat, no one answered. So they called the pig, err, cops and they went to his place to have a look-see. And there he was, dead as a doorknob. He's survived by this really adorable dog, who's probably gonna end up in a pound or something. Hope they find him a good home. Poor doggie.

Kill your friends, guilt free!

Tue, 15 Mar 2005 14:43:08 GMT

While under the incapacitating dominion of my aliment this past week, and thus being bored out of my goddamn mind, I discovered the wonderful world of frags. Frags being the ultra dorky term computer dorks use to identify a kill in a first person shooter. When the original Unreal was released back in '98, I was just getting back into videogames after a three year absence. Said absence was a result of my, at the time, broke ass not being able to afford the over priced cartages of the the Nintendo era. I wasn't at all impressed with what the ads and screenshots for Unreal were presenting. It looked to be little more than another Doom rip off that featured green monsters instead of pink ones. Anyhoo, I never would have dreamed that seven years later I'd find myself enthralled by it's third online incarnation. Who would've thought that blowing away hoard after hoard of men and women with some wicked artillery would be so satisfying. Simply put, this shit fun! I can't wait to play this thing online once we get a broadband connection.

Tue, 15 Mar 2005 13:56:20 GMT

My income tax refund came.

My cough left.

Things are well.

Look, more polygonal puppies!

Cough. Hack. Woof.

Mon, 14 Mar 2005 03:49:21 GMT

Gary Busey and Robert Wagner are no Troy McClures. Indeed they're not...

"The Simpsons" keeps on getting not-funnier by the episode.

We were supposed to go to the monthly fetish party last night, but alas, I was sick. Bedridden sick. That's right, down for the count. Flat on my ass down; along with my chance to put the sensual moves on Carolin. Stupid microbes. Next week for sure. Really...

On the plus side, I am feeling better. Not well, but better. Sure am.

Tomagotchi? DigiPet? "Nintendogs" does one better...

That's right! Soon you too will be able to raise your own polygonal pups!

Still... Can't... Shake... Cough... Just keep from coughing, otherwise it'll just make you cough more.

Group shot...

Tue, 01 Mar 2005 13:34:43 GMT

...sans Regan. We lost her at this point.

We made the cut!

Tue, 01 Mar 2005 13:20:01 GMT

You can see the rest of the photos from that night at the Fetish Factory website...

Once again, we open with a shot of the beautiful Carolin.

At this point, Karlene was well beyond the point of rational thought.

Here's one of me and the misses.

CHOMP! MMMM Mighty tasty!

Regan shows off for the camera.

What are Reagan's thoughts on her new studed collar? "Now I know what a dog trying to bite its ass feels like."

Full Metal Fowl

Mon, 21 Feb 2005 07:22:28 GMT

"My God! It's like there's an orgy in my mouth!"

-Stewie's thoughts on Fig Newtons

"My God! This better than sex!"

-Stewie's thoughts on pancakes

Adult Swim premiered Seth Green's "Robot Chicken" tonight. It blew... hard. The only funny gags were Tarzan knocking the monkey into some trees and the little kid getting body checked against a urinal. Here I was getting ready to ROFLMAO only to be treated to a bunch of humorless pop culture references. The other Seth, the McFarlane, wrote better shit on "Family Guy's" worst episode. And I don't even consider myself a "Family Guy" fan. A.S. honchos need to fire Green's ass and call up the guys who write "Twisted Toyfare Theater" and have them bat out something funny out their asses. Seth, the Green one, needs to stick with what he does best... NOT writing.

FETISH PARTY!!!

Mon, 21 Feb 2005 06:51:18 GMT

A very wild time was had by all! No cut for the pansies. Don't like it? Tough shit, dogs! EAT IT!

My date for that evening, Carolin.

Left to Right: Emilie and Regan... that's a joint in Rea's mouth.

Em. J. and R.G. again.

Karlene gettin' ready.

Crazy Car and Krazy Kar make sweet, sweet love to the camera.

The whole gang's here!

Yes, Karlene and Regan are both topless...

Yes, they made out at the party. Sadly, no camera's were allowed inside. So the only evidence of said make out session is in my head and in the heads of the two others who witnessed the tongue probing. Next party... maybe.

Sweet Clementine

Mon, 21 Feb 2005 06:17:37 GMT

You scored as Artistic. Congratulations, you scored Artistic. You're looking for the unique movie in the bunch. You've probably watched a lot of movies that nobody has ever heard of, and good for you. You also know good filmmaking when you see it. You just get it, no questions asked. Check out: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Amelie, Garden State, Lost in Translation.

</td>

Artistic

100%

Mindfuck

80%

Drama/Suspense

60%

Sci-Fi/Fantasy

40%

Sadistic Humour

35%

Romantic Comedy

20%

Mindless Action Flick

Movie Recommendation.
created with QuizFarm.com

Breaking the silence with tragedy...

Mon, 21 Feb 2005 06:06:18 GMT

Oh sweet Jeebus! Gonzo journalist Hunter S. Thompson is dead! He went out Hemingway style.

Good Times

Sat, 22 Jan 2005 12:54:36 GMT

Tonight I'll be dining and clubbing with a lingerie model, a fashion designer and a certified M.I.L.F. and an assortment of various other bohemians and sexpots. Can you say ORGY?!... Pictures tomorrow.

Leader of the pack

Tue, 18 Jan 2005 16:05:46 GMT

me: I got it.

Gloria: Good! Now I don't have to pick up anymore papers.

-Monday January 17th, 2005 10:14 P.M.-

The it^1. referenced above is none other than the group leader position I applied and interviewed for last month. Yesterday I was offered the position and said yes. Not right away, of course. I waited till after lunch to give 'the brass the affirmative. Just to make them sweat a little...

The night got off a pretty lousy start, not that I was feeling any less disgruntled over the whole Veronica debacle, and I'm still not cause my heart is still breaking. Since I lost my badge Saturday night, I had to sign in at the security station. But this asshole security guard makes me sign twice cause, so he says, he can't make out what I wrote down. Never mind the fact that I have immaculate handwriting and some of the most legible penmanship this side of the health service field. Already in a pissy mood, I cussed the son of a bitch out, "Fucking asshole," just loud enough so that it appeared I was talking to myself, but still audible to anyone within earshot, including him. Should have said, "Well, if you never learned to read, that's hardly my fault," and walked away without scribbling down another Goddamn thing. I'll have to complain to H.R. on Wednesday when I go in there to get a replacement badge...

Ah, fuck it! This weekend I'm going out with Emilie and company and having a real good time.

1. Look under "Opportunities out the ass."

No relief for the bleeding heart

Mon, 17 Jan 2005 13:38:12 GMT

"You once asked me, quite cruelly, what I have to offer a woman like that...."

-me

"Misato, how can you be so cruel?"

-Shinji Ikari

"Self-improvement is masturbation. Self-destruction is the answer."

-Tyler Durden

What kind of loser gets rejected by his own kind?... Why, THIS loser of course... Veronica turned me down. She wants to fuck Eli, not me. Even though she's said I'm sexy and a stud, and grabbed in ways no one's ever grabbed me and made sexual advances at me. What's a reject to do?... Get high on Saturday night, AT WORK!... Go out after the Saturday shift with his close friend, Emilie, go bar hopping and get hammered at Hollywood's Seminole Hard Rock Hotel and Casino. And finally, wind down with another doobie at home. A doobie doesn't turn you down or say it would rather be smoked by another, more worthy person. Nope. It just won't do it. What's next? Probably non-stop, unprotected, sexual liaisons with a multitude of various anonymous partners... Then yesterday, she leaves me a message saying I called her early in the morning; WHICH I DIDN'T! It wasn't an angry message, mind you, she seemed her usual cheerful self, but still, it made me feel worse because it procured further abashment in my poor, already boggled cognizance. To top things off, I can't find my work ID. I may have lost it between one of Saturday's chemical induced stupors... You're never more emo than when you hit rock bottom, face down... Back to the welcoming cradle of darkness between my sheets.

Missing You

Fri, 14 Jan 2005 13:22:47 GMT

I miss my livejournal. I miss writing in my livejournal. i miss reading your livejournals. but while the soul is willing, the eye balls can not tolerate. i'm awaiting the arrival of my replacement video card from Cyber Power so I can once again stand to look at the screen for more than a few minutes without going cross eyed for half the day.

RECENTLY:

-Mike and Emilie are no longer talking because Mike decided he wanted to fuck Emilie and then snub her like the fucking prick he's turned into.

-Emilie, myself and several cohorts are are off to paint Broward county a healthy shade of chaos! Of course, I work Saturday so we're going late. Like 1:30ish late.

The end of the humanity

Sun, 09 Jan 2005 06:02:23 GMT

The windows and balcony door are open. The house is a cool 70 degrees... While driving to Dunkin' Donuts, Honuts, Gonuts, Gonads, I fantasize about running over pedestrians to the adrenal laced sounds of hardcore German metal. What's wrong with me? All that's left is for me to start masturbating furiously to documentaries where people are skinned alive and carving the names of the objects of my obsession into my cock; and I'd be a prime candidate for a padded cell... It's been less than a month since its purchase, and already I've fucked up my new 'puter. Never tweeak the settings on your video card unless you know how to undo what you'll do before you do it. And back up. ALWAYS back up... Now I'll have to wait till Monday to call tech support... Goddman it all... Thank Jesus-Allah-Buddha for Mary Jane... So i'ts alright... Mary Jane Potman.

It's Pat!

Sat, 08 Jan 2005 13:54:06 GMT

My supervisor is a laborious cunt. She's what happens when you stuff pitbull DNA into the body of a chihuahua. Short, squat. Loud, obnoxious. Mean, vicious. Some people are hard to work with but they're absolute ladies and gents outside the office. Other's are total pricks in the real world, but the most well comported, professional workhorse you could ever hope for. Pat, however, is a rare bread of donkey. She's the kind that's both impossible to work with, or under as is our unfortunate case and a totally unreasonable human being. She likes to do things the hard way. When someone makes a suggestion, she'll immediately shoot it down. When something she NEEDS to pay attend to goes down, she, either on purpose or by her own lack of common sense, totally ignores it. There are times when she accuses people of wrong doing and threatens to write him or her up without just grounds for said accusation. She has to be the dumbest motherfucker ever offered a supervior position. We often joke, (with stark Scottish accents) "Aye, 'ere comes Mister Frodo. Looks like she's been diggin' intah thah pipeweed again." The only person dumber than her, HAS to be the asshole she conned into actually giving her that job. Thankfully, she'll be gone for the next few weeks, doing work up at the Deerfield lab. If only she would stay there, where she belongs. It's times like these I'm grateful for things like computers and pot.

P.S.Julia Sweeney's great, bless her heart... And yes, Pat's heart too.

Looks like I'll be hosting a "Star Trek" convention...

Wed, 05 Jan 2005 13:01:49 GMT

In the year 2005 I resolve to:

Start a cult.

Get your resolution here

When Galaxies Collide (vol. 1)

Wed, 05 Jan 2005 12:49:36 GMT

If the old cliche about photographs is true, then here's a pictorial essay composed of some twenty-one thousand words...

At The Airport:

here's mommy at the hotel...

On The A Train:

from left to right, my aunt Maggie, cousin Ashley and mom...

Rockefeller Center & The Tree:

Ground Zero (day 2):

Meanwhile, under Rockefeller:

My crew, along with my New Yorker cousin Michelle, her two sons and her mom...

_to be continued...

Hell is waiting a very long time at an airport terminal

Mon, 03 Jan 2005 09:33:23 GMT

!!!!HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

Cousin Ashley and I (and my the Dumbo size ears I got from dear mom)
at La Guardia yesterday afternoon

An early check in, two delays and some turbulence later, we finally made it home. Albeit one and one half hours behind schedule, but we did make it back in one piece. Thankfully I had Ashley's game to help hasten the duration of the dizzying flight. Slide show, tomorrow. Right now, bed.

Less Than 24 Hours Till NYC

Wed, 29 Dec 2004 12:27:57 GMT

This is it, my last entry for 2004. By this time tomorrow mom, my aunt, my cousin Ashley and I will be landing at La Guardia airport in New York to welcome in the new year. Bidding the old year a farewell always used to make me sad. That isn't the case these days. Perhaps maturing has caused me to detach the part of my heart that has always found sentimentality in something that's waining, fading away. Whatever the case, I'm excited about this trip. It'll be my first time outside of Florida.

----------------------------------

If anyone's interested in getting me a late Christmas present, this piqued my fancy...

At $120 it's a bit steep, but it's so cool that I might actually wear it to every day activities... to work... to church... to the groceries store... Who am I kidding? I don't even go to church. Way to be preposterous, Alex!

----------------------------------

Here's an article about the videogame industry. I tore it out from the July 2003 issue of Business Week magazine I fond in the break room at work...

GRADUATING
SUMMA CUM SIMS

SORRY, JAY LENO, BUT IT'S NO
joke. Southern Methodist
University is starting the nation's
first school to train
video-game designers. And
contrary to your recent on-
air quip, a video-gaming de-
grees not "more useless"
than one in political science.
Grads of the 18-month pro-
gram could start out earning
$48,000 in an industry that's
adding 5,000 jobs a year,
according to Interactive Digital Soft-
ware Assn., a trade group.
Top game designers can
make as much as $300,000 a
year. The Dallas university
expects some 40 students will
fork over $37,000 in tuition
for the graduate program,
which starts in the fall.
While the SMU Guildhall
school of video games will
teach everything from animation
to software development,
its biggest lesson will not
be technical. It seems the
stereotype is true: Designers
tend to be nerdy young men
with no social skills- and
that's a shortcoming the
school will address. "What we
need are people who know
how to work as a team," says
Paul Jaquays, a director at
Microsoft's game lab who
helped design the course.
"Right now a lot of people
spend too much time flaming
each other." Looks like SMU
might crib from poli-sci and
add a course in conflict reso-
lution, too. Charles Haddad

How will they address the shortcoming in question?...

Teacher: Class, your homework assignment this evening will be to go to a bar, have a few drinks and hit on as many girls as possible. For extra credit, try to see if you can lay one, or all, of the girls you hit on.

----------------------------------

Alright, goodbye my friends. I shall return with the tide that will wash ashore a new year for us to do with what we please.

-Alex

Since I gotta be up till 8 anyway...

Tue, 28 Dec 2004 11:55:36 GMT

xmas party at CreepyJynx's house!!

apiechan
apiechan drank 7 lagers.

apiechan revealed to the room that in a previous incarnation they were a fat gay unicyclist
who took great pride in their marvellous ability to impersonate freddie mercury.

Oh apiechan! You make Alex Higgins look dry! You sultry fellow thou!

thejealoussound
thejealoussound drank 12 sambuccas, 11 sherrys, 15 ciders, 11 goldschlagers, 8 white wines and 10 vodkas.

thejealoussound and matoaka23 fought all night after matoaka23 whipped out a picture
of thejealoussound's naked ass and passed it around to alll of the giggling minnions in the room. anaxareteia wet themselves amidst the hysteria.

worthlessness
worthlessness drank 5 sambuccas.

worthlessness was arrested for screaming "Hot Sushi Yon Kebab!" at a war veteran
who happened to be hobbling past the house at the time.

anaxareteia
anaxareteia drank 4 white wines, 7 cosmopolitans, 13 hot toddys, 10 sambuccas and 13 rums.

provokeasmile
provokeasmile drank 7 aftershocks, 6 mescals, 14 coffee liqueurs and 8 vodkas.

__kirbz
__kirbz drank 13 pilsners, an aftershock, 15 vermouths and 3 pernods.

creepyjynx
creepyjynx drank 3 brandys.

kissmetomorrow
kissmetomorrow drank 11 ciders, 9 stouts, an everclear and 7 absinthes.

starryeyedtink
starryeyedtink drank 13 cognacs, 4 vodkas and 10 vermouths.

matoaka23
matoaka23 drank 2 white wines, 5 white russians and 7 rums.

hollaxatholly
hollaxatholly drank 14 ales.

oh_so_toxic
oh_so_toxic drank 9 brandys and 4 aligator bites.

Clean up at CreepyJynx's place! Urgh bejesus man, there's soup pieces in this barfpile! Fucking ell theres 2 of them!

Xmas Party?

Drunken fights, hammer attacks, glorious turkeys, ridiculous amounts of alcohol, sex, drugs and rock n roll

Enter your name below to experience the ultimate in complete useless bollocks!

Can you really get arrested for yelling at a war vet?...

For the record, I have NEVER had so much as a swig of brandy.